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Writer's pictureMadi Breedlove

The Sisterhood You Want vs. The Sisterhood You Need

As soon as I got to campus, my first thought was how desperately I wanted to fit in. I felt like joining a sorority was the perfect way to gain that sense of belonging I had been seeking. I joined my chapter in October 2020 through continuous open bidding. I was part of the small population that knew nothing about sorority recruitment or Greek life before joining. I had no interest in joining the “best” sorority on campus or the most popular organization. I just desperately wanted a sisterhood where I could make an impact. 



Although this is out of the norm for some, I am thankful this was my mindset. Knowing myself I would have gotten caught up choosing based on popularity rather than where I belonged. After I joined is when I began to hear rumblings about which chapters were “top tier” and which ones were not, I just couldn’t understand this system because I saw so much value in each of the organizations on my campus. During my college experience, I have had the opportunity to serve as the Vice President of Recruitment, Chapter President, and Panhellenic President. Through the past few years, I have seen potential members choose the organization they think they want, instead of the chapter they need. So many women fall into this mindset and then wonder why sorority life wasn’t for them. 



My biggest piece of advice for potential members is to consider going into recruitment with an open mind. Yes, it's important to do your research and know what you want, but being able to lean into the process will make it way less overwhelming. I know you will hear it a million times but the process is there for a reason! Sororities are based on shared values, trusting the process means letting your values guide your experience and focus on what you truly want, not what others are telling you to want. It is important to draw from your own opinions throughout recruitment. Don’t let the people around you tell you that the chapter you are most excited about isn’t good enough. Your sorority experience is exactly that YOURS. When choosing the perfect chapter for you, focus on where you see yourself growing and where you see yourself making meaningful relationships. 


If you don’t get invited back to that one chapter you wanted so badly, take a breath, I promise it'll be okay. While it may be disappointing, if you redirect your focus to finding the chapter you need to become the best version of yourself you will end up right where you belong. It is all in the mindset! If you want to see change, create it! The beauty of every chapter is all the work to be done, you have the perfect opportunity to get involved, be a leader, and change the way people view your organization. Regardless of what chapter you end up calling home, your sorority experience will be what you make it. These sororities are choosing you based on what you may bring to the chapter. They may see you as a chapter president one day or a VP of recruitment and be the change the organization needs. 


My hope for you in recruitment is that you tap into the value of trusting the process. It can be so hard to let go of what we think we want but imagine what is waiting for you in a place you didn’t know you wanted!! 

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